Under Pressure

I don't do things by half. It may be stubbornness or perversity but I tend to fight through beyond reasonableness. So yesterday when fatigue hit me with the force of a ten tonne truck I carried on driving. Fortunately it wasn't a real ten tonne truck. And I didn't have much choice. I was in the outside lane on a heavily congested bit of dual carriageway in London.

I do have a history of ignoring symptoms and getting on with things. For years prior to DX, I probably ignored fatigue, lapses in memory, bowel and bladder symptoms. Now I try not to. If something pops into my head, I know I have to act on it straight away otherwise it is lost. I telephone someone as soon as I think of them. Sometimes I make phone calls to myself to leave a message on my own answermachine. As for the bowel and bladder, if I need to go I need to go then!

Similarly, if I'm going to do something I'll go for it wholeheartedly. No holding back here. I might do things at the last minute but then the pressure of getting it done just spurs me on more.

It may not be sensible to cram in everything I do and I probably should be packing a bag right now instead of writing this. I didn't really need to remake my bed this morning. I could have waited before producing the newsletter for my agency. I still  have to learn the brief for next week's job and drive 200 miles... I expect a forthcoming Fatigue Course will show me the error of my ways. Certainly for the last few and next week, I am chock-a-block - work, medical and personal stuff. I will plough on through though, That's the way I am and this is how it is. Under Pressure.